I Blame Moe
by LetsSingtheDoomSong
Summary: You won't know who Moe is, but she is our very perverted friend at our highschool. Me & Dani Respect the Hobos were sitting at her house thinking of random ideas & suddenly we got talking about something. This was the result of it. So it's written by us!


A/N:...yeah...we have no life.... so, yeah, this is gonna get very sexual & kinky. Just to warn you. So if you think you love our boys more than we do & decide to take us out...well, let's just say we're well armed & we have a _lot _of space to hide you after we're done with you. So stay away from our houses.

Dymond pressed down on the crusher & Dani yanked her hand back with a cry of, "Watch the fingers!"

"Aw, you don't need them," Dymond laughed.

"I beg to differ. Not only do I need those fingers to pull a trigger, but I think Reno would be a little disappointed."

"He'll love you without your fingers."

"Yeah, but his sweet spot's a little less enjoyable without them."

"Wooo. Kinky," she sang. "So, where _is_ his sweet spot?"

"Like I'd tell you!"

"Zack's is on his neck," she announced.

"Really?" Dani seemed intrigued. "Makes sense I guess."

"Now where's Reno's?"

"Guess."

"Um...neck?"

Dani shook her head. "Nope."

"Hm. Stomach."

"No."

"His shoulder?"

"Close."

"His shoulder blades!" She shouted, snapping her fingers & pointing at Dani.

Dani smiled bashfully & nodded. "Yep."

Dymond cupped her chin. "Makes you wonder where everyone else's is."

"Where everyone else's _what _is?" Maggie asked, appearing in the room, Genesis trailing obediently behind her.

"Sweet spot," Dani & Dymond chorused.

Maggie giggled and clapped her hands. "This sounds like fun!"

"Where's Genesis's?" Dymond asked.

Maggie looked at the poet behind her. "His shoulders!" Genesis turned a bright red & covered Maggie's mouth.

"Really? Huh... Never thought of that..." Dani mused, rubbing her neck.

"That's because you're too busy finding out where Reno's sweet spot is!" Dymond laughed.

"It's not like I tried!"

"Oh, so you have instincts?"

"I guess..."

"Let's go ask everyone else!" Maggie jumped up & down.

"We can have Dani get them!"

"What? No! Why do I have to do it?!" Dani questioned.

"Because you have all their numbers."

"Where's your cellphone?"

There was a long pause as she thought hard as to where the device went. "I think I dropped it in Modeohiem."

"No wonder you haven't responded to my texts!" Dani shouted, smacking Dymond 'Gibbs'-style.

After Dani did call everyone, they met inside the break area. "So...why are we here?" Reno drawled.

"We're gonna play a game!" Dymond chirped. "It's called 'Find the Sweet Spot!'"

Tseng's face turned bright red. "I don't think I like this game," he muttered.

"Tseng can go first!" Dymond exclaimed. "Where's yours?"

"I'll be damned if I tell you."

"It's the dot on his forehead!" Laney shouted.

Tseng's face turned an even deeper shade of red. "Oh my god! After all this time!" Maggie cried.

"No wonder you were always so horny for Laney," Dani added. "Wow. I'm sorry, Dad."

"All these years in physical torment," Dymond sighed.

"I think it's Rufus' turn," Beth quipped, smiling slyly as her lover glowered at her.

"Don't," he hissed.

"Where is it?!" Dymond asked, eyes bright with anticipation, like a child at Christmas.

"Not telling," Rufus insisted.

"If you don't we're gonna sic Dani on you," Maggie threatened. "She can sense these things."

"Oh, God! Maggie, I am _not _gonna go caress my boss' hips to see if that's his turn-on!"

"So it's his hips?" Dymond surmised. Rufus flushed & stared at the table intensely. "It _is_!" Dymond cried triumphantly. "That's two out of six!"

"Who's the sixth?" Zack queried.

"I'm gonna find Luxiere's," Dymond replied. Zack nodded in understanding. "So, now for Rude!" Rude just stared. "You're not very good at this game. Dani, what are your vibes telling you?"

"Uh...."

"You're right, it's his chest," Dymond decided. Rude shifted uncomfortably & Jesse watched him, obviously laughing internally at his discomfort. "Is it, Daddy?" Jesse nodded confirmation. "Yay! I knew it!"

"Seeeeephy," Maggie sang. "What's yours?"

Sephiroth smirked. "Nobody here, except me, knows. And I'm not telling."

Dymond grabbed his hair & yanked. "Found it!"

Sephiroth just shook his head & unwrapped her fingers. "You can keep guessing, but you'll never know for sure."

Dymond scowled. "Fine! Angeal!"

"No one-"

"I know where it is! I found it while training one day!" Dymond grinned. "It's-" Zack slapped a hand over her lips. She pulled his hand down & shouted, "Abdomen! I bit him there once!"

"How'd you get your teeth there?" Beth asked.

"He had me in a headlock."

"Ah."

"Fine," Angeal surrendered. "You got me."

"I know! Now for Luxiere! I'm gonna go find him! Bye!" And the girl disappeared.

"So, why won't you tell uswhere _your _sweet spots are?" Zack challenged.

"The people who need to know already do," Dani replied. "No explanation required."

"But that's not fair!" Zack whined.

"You confessed," Maggie gloated. "Now you're gonna have to find out for yourselves."

"He already _knows_ where mine is," Dymond stated, dragging a terrified Luxiere behind her. "And I found Luxiere's."

"Really?" Maggie asked.

"Yep. His lower back."

"How'd you find that one?" Dani asked.

Dymond giggled. "I grabbed his shirt when he tried to run. Apparently I hit it _just _right."


End file.
